Kathy Griffin mouths off more about “Kathy”

Being on a conference call with Kathy Griffin is a whirlwind experience. She talks fast and she’s funny so trying to write down what she is saying is no easy task!

I focused and got down her responses to my questions for my Gay Star News story posted yesterday. Then just listened and laughed as she took questions from the other reporters because I knew a transcript would be coming today from Bravo which organized the call to publicize Kathy’s new talk show.

Here are some highlights:

On what topics she will be discussing: “First of all there is, of course, everything from actual genuine news items And I am very into The Celebrity Apprentice, although I do not concur with Donald Trump who I believe is a birther now. But I do like the cast of that show. Also I went to my mom’s apartment last night because she only stays at my house until she finds me annoying, and then basically she kicks herself out. And she would really like me to just have a panel of Bill O’Reilly, Sean Hannity and Laura Ingraham. So unfortunately I had to shoot that one down. But I mean, look, I’m loving everything from the fact that the Wilson Phillips gals have their own reality show, to the fact that they performed at a Loehmann’s days ago.

Is anyone off limits? “Nothing is off limits and no person is off limits. And that’s another reason I really kind of have to just surround myself with civilians. And by the way, I know I’m kind of talking like Jack Nicholson in A Few Good Men, but I do need – I do say civilians because I feel that — unlike celebrities — they can probably speak freely.

On her inspirations for the new show: “You know, to tell you the truth, look, I’m 51 years old, so truly my inspirations go back to like – well okay, even Jack Paar was before my time. But like, you know, it’s elements of Johnny Carson inspired me, I’m not saying I’m Johnny Carson. But everything from when Joan Rivers took over and, of course, was outrageous and unlike anybody we’d seen on TV before, to the Mike Douglas Show. And then, you know, all the shows that are currently on, I watched them, I love them.

On appealing to the gays: “Well I have a little too much for them. Look, my struggle’s going to be to get the straights. So this show is for women and gay men. And it’s for married men on the down low. It’s for experimental men that have girlfriends that dress very well and have something to tell her but they can’t find the right time. It’s for guys who maybe just cheated on their girlfriends and now they need to make it up to her, so they will do f*cking anything. It’s for guys that fake it and act like they care about women’s issues, but don’t give a shit and they’re trying to get laid. That’s my demographic.

Why comics make good talk show hosts: “Nobody knows how to fill dead air like a comedian. Also we love to talk about ourselves and our thoughts and our feelings and our musings. And we like to also be offensive, which you will certainly get in buckets on this show.

On having fellow Bravo personalities like the Real Housewives on: “I will say the one thing Bravo’s been very nice about is they actually said I don’t have to have any of the Bravo people on if I don’t want to. So if it lends itself to what we’re talking about – well actually I don’t actually know if I’m ever going to have those Bravo people on. Because the nice thing is I want to be able to really talk smack about them, which I can’t do if they’re sitting in a swivel chair two inches away from me. And often I don’t think I could complete a sentence if I’m trying to – if I have issues dealing with the lights coming off of NeNe’s sparkly – and I believe she says (Louboutins) because she can’t pronounce the name of her own shoe. So I might find that blinding. You know, I don’t know if I can handle all that bedazzling.

Is she afraid to make fun of any famous people? “I’m trying to think of people I should be afraid of. And I know that there are people that logically I should be afraid of. But I just think that it is antithetical to all things comedy to be afraid of someone because I think that it’s important that they’re all fair game and that they’re all I mean, I guess I might be a little bit afraid of Lou Ferrigno because he did threaten to throw Lisa Lampanelli out a window on The Celebrity Apprentice. Okay, I admit it, I’m a little nervous around DMX when I watch him on Couples Therapy. But these aren’t people that are really in my daily world.