Via Instagram: Happy to finally share my essay with friends overseas & you.
YOU’RE ENOUGH. By me.
The leading cause of death amongst young people remains suicide, and I believe most of this is due to expectation and pressure, each handed down through generations. It is completely wrong and no longer working for many. People need to know that they are, in fact, OK as they are. They’re more than enough. That’s why I’m sharing this story.
When COVID started I took the opportunity to pen The Dance, a semi-autobiographical screenplay. Every character in the film is a facet of myself, and through the process of reliving memories and writing about brave characters and teenagers who don’t think they’re strong but endure so many tough life experiences, I accepted that everything has led me to this moment. I realised that somewhere along the way, I’d forgotten how brave I was. I found myself, 34, single and feeling trapped in a box with no light, one I’d learnt to live with and forgotten I was in.
It seems everyday there are new labels popping up to identify those around us. I still can’t find one that fits me.
Love has always come in so many different forms to me. I love people who inspire me. Not all love is sexual, and I don’t think people always understand that. The fact is, I love many different people, for many different reasons. When I get to know someone romantically, I’m not interested in their age, gender, sexuality, or religion. I’m interested in connecting on a human level. Sexuality has always been very secondary to me. In a way, I now feel very blessed.
But now, I feel a tremendous responsibility to speak out, to help people understand and not look at others with judgment, or think that people are lying, or hiding, or shying away. Some choose to live their true selves privately – maybe it’s sacred, or too intimate or maybe some are exploring in their own way, everyone’s journey is unique. No-one has the right to tell someone else’s story, so here’s mine.
As a young boy in Adelaide, I was sensitive, dressing up to entertain people from as early as I can remember. Now that’s my job. I began at an all-boys school, where I was bullied from start to finish.
I began at an all-boys school, where I was bullied from start to finish. I remember being yelled at on school camp by an adult carer, because my only friend was a girl: “IT’S NOT NORMAL!” The words stuck; a dark and lonely time followed. But the names so graciously bestowed upon me in primary and middle school felt misplaced, as I was never attracted to the same sex, even though part of me felt that would be easier. I eventually left Adelaide for the Australian Ballet School, where I had my first love and broken heart with a girl I might’ve married. In retrospect, I was 17 – too young for me to be engaged.
Later, at NIDA, I met a guy I connected with emotionally, mentally and physically. I was over the moon. I could finally be what people always wanted me to be, so I told everyone! In return, I was told that if I was anything but straight I’d never find work, and that I needed to hide my newfound love. To add to the confusion, the two mentors who told me this were openly gay themselves; they were earnestly trying to protect me and did indeed have my best interests at heart. That was just the reality.
It was well-known that if an actor was open about their private life and was not conforming, they didn’t land leading roles. The sentiment shattered me because I finally thought I knew who I was, I actually became an activist at that point. I was really out, loud, and proud. Ultimately, my heart was again broken, and I again fell in love with a woman. I was too embarrassed to tell anyone, as I’d made such a fuss about my same-sex relationship. “You can’t be both,” some would say. “You’re confused.” No shit! At that point I began to be more selective with whom I shared my world.
I was in no way mentally prepared for what would happen when Ben Rafter made his entrance on Aussie TV. At 22, I was back in a relationship with a guy. Having been fairly open prior, some public cottoned on, wanted to know “my deal”. But tormented by the recurring idea of being labeled when I wasn’t even sure myself, I decided it was best to be private. My world became smaller but my love became bigger, and our relationship more sacred and special for it.
I was in no way mentally prepared for what would happen when Ben Rafter made his entrance on Aussie TV. At 22, I was back in a relationship with a guy. Having been fairly open prior, some public cottoned on, wanted to know “my deal”. But tormented by the recurring idea of being labeled when I wasn’t even sure myself, I decided it was best to be private. My world became smaller but my love became bigger, and our relationship more sacred and special for it.
Despite those first few years in the public eye being full of moments of great confusion and depression, we got through it. Eventually, I earned mutual respect and confusion from the media. I thank them for that now.
What saddened me about my decision were the people who came out of the woodwork to implore: “You should be out there protesting for equality, Hugh.” To which I replied, “I am! My silence is my protest.”
When the marriage equality vote loomed in 2017, I thought I should come honest about the relationships I’d had in the past. I approached a friend who worked with the LGBTQIA+ community only to be asked not to come out at that moment. “You will have more of an impact and effect with those on the fence as a neutral voice. You are someone people respect and relate to regardless of anything – everyone else is already flying the flag”
I did as he suggested. I still campaigned, but from a moral place rather than a personal position. There was power in my privacy, in keeping some things to myself, an important lesson to me. The relationships that I had with both sexes felt more precious, because they were between me, my friends, my family and my partner.
It’s hard for others to empathize what it feels like to play “the boy next door,” but not always feel like him, if you don’t say anything people always assume on your behalf, they never say “maybe that’s private”.
As June dawned, I received a message from a stranger, a member of the community who kindly let me know how sad I must be and how miserable I must feel since everyone knew who I was.
How can anyone know who someone else is? This wasn’t foreign to me, so I thanked him, and assured him I was indeed happily working it out for myself. And even if I ever did find somewhere for myself that fit, I still wouldn’t tell him, as his personal business was none of mine nor mine his.
But I also realised that if I never addressed these issues, if I maintained a silent protest, people would always think I had something to hide, or denying others that expression. In many ways I wish I didn’t even have to write this, but I feel a responsibility to others who might come after me.
By sharing my story now, becoming more transparent maybe others who are private might be given a break? We might live and let them live as they wish. I believe labels are for clothes not for people. Even if a few people read this and relate then sharing this was worth the world to me.
My advice to anyone still figuring it all out is not to worry, right where you are is enough. You don’t need to know all the answers today, or even tomorrow. I may not know exactly who I am until I’m 80, that’s totally fine with me. I had zero self confidence in my twenties and I hated what I saw from an early age. It’s not too late to go back and give love to yourself and try letting others know that they too are perfect just as they are.
Today I declare “I am a human”, just like you, trying my best to navigate, grow and live through an ever changing world.
I recognize more now than ever our pressing need to celebrate our common humanity, before we are male and female we are already human, born in a state of being. From this vantage point we can accept we are all the same yet honour our differences be it; ethnicity, gender, job, sexuality, religion, financial status. None of us are the same but I see more togetherness than separation when I look at you. Humans shift and evolve as the world around us does, that’s part of what makes us special. If there’s one thing I’ve learnt in 2020 it’s to relinquish control, embrace the unknown.
It can all be confusing, especially when we’re taught we need to know who we are, but life happens, hearts break, we grow and change again.
Indeed, if I could talk to my younger self, I’d say, “You’re completely fine. You’re on the right track. You’re enough. You’ll get there. You’ll work it out, or maybe you never will. It is how you feel now that matters. And that’s my message to you.????????
“Everything happens for a reason, nothing happens by chance.
Never judge anyone unless you’ve walked in their shoes.” Gran and Poppa.
THANK YOU FOR READING AND THANK YOU TO EVERYONE WHO HAS SHARED THEIR OWN EXPERIENCES WITH ME SINCE SUNDAY. I’ve been trying to respond to you all as you deserve the time given the beautiful words and support you’ve shown. Thank you again and I hope my message helps you as yours have helped me. Speak Love, Always your friend, Hugh-man.
Matt Dallas has grown up before out eyes and today he turns 38!
He’s gone starring on Kyle XY to becoming a married man (husband is the equally dreamy Blue Hamilton) and father (their adorable son is named Crow).
I so enjoy seeing Matt and his family on their YouTube videos over the years and am so glad he has become such a wonderful example of how you can be a famous actor and be openly gay.
A number of years ago when Matt was still starring on Kyle XY, he was a guest on The Howard Stern Show and I remember cringing when Matt said indicated he wasn’t gay and Howard just wasn’t buying it. I felt so bad for Matt because I knew exactly why he wasn’t being truthful: he was starring in a series.
But things are changing because since then and a growing list of actors have come out publicly while starring in a TV series.
Matt has navigated the journey well and I wish him all kinds of success in the future.
Tiffany Trump led a tiny rally in which she claimed to have gay friends and eliminated the T from LGBTQ. Just when I thought I couldn’t hate the Trumps more, and it’s hard to believe Tiffany has any friends
I used to think Tiffany trump was the only decent adult trump child, but now I see she's as much a pathetic lying grifter as the rest of them. SAD! pic.twitter.com/qqlwbzdAfd
I'm terrified of speaking on camera. I can speak in public to hundreds or thousands, but put a camera in my face and I freeze. — Thank you Tiffany Trump for teaching me that looking like a fool on camera won't kill me. Because, girl, you'd be dead. https://t.co/FCCL1zQqNG
Wishing the best today to beloved actor Jeff Bridges who revealed on Monday afternoon that he has been diagnosed with lymphoma.
“As the Dude would say.. New S**T has come to light,” the 70-year-old Academy-Award winner tweeted. “I have been diagnosed with Lymphoma. Although it is a serious disease, I feel fortunate that I have a great team of doctors and the prognosis is good. I’m starting treatment and will keep you posted on my recovery.”
Bridges continued in a Twitter thread that he is “profoundly grateful” for the love and support from his family and friends, and was appreciative of prayers and well wishes following the announcement.
This handsome guy has been a big star since 1971′s The Last Picture Show and he’s been going strong ever since. He is currently in production on the action-drama series The Old Man, in which he stars in and is executive producing. The series is set to debut on FX on Hulu in 2021,
I really developed a crush on him after seeing him in Against All Odds. I don’t think he’s ever been so sexy in a movie and he’s been plenty sexy in lots of them including Jagged Edge, Starman and The Fabulous Baker Boys.
What is so impressive about Jeff is how he has lasted so long as an A-List actor in major films scoring Oscar nominations for The Last Picture Show and Thunderbolt and Lightfoot in the 1970s, Starman in 1985, and The Contender in 2001.
On his fifth nomination, for Crazy Heart in 2009, he finally won an Oscar. The next year, he was nominated again for True Grit and most recently in 2017 for Hell or High Water.
His other memorable films include Tron, The Fisher King, The Big Lebowski, Fearless, Fat City, Bad Company, King Kong, Tucker: The Man and His Dream, American Heart, Seabiscuit, and Iron Man, among others.
About a decade ago, I did a cover story on Jeff for Orange Coast Magazine. It was a telephone interview that began in his hotel after he had spent the day filming The Door in the Floor that he had to cut short. He called me back the next morning while he was being driven back to the set.
It was a wonderful conversation about his family, his movies and his art.
Not long after, I got invited to a party in Santa Monica celebrating the publication of his book of photographs. I went up to Jeff to say hello and reminded him of our interview.
He had no bloody idea what the heck I was talking about!
Back in 2018, I was in Palm Springs for a week hanging out with some of my best guy friends for my birthday week.
The week was highlighted by an intimate concert followed by a meet and greet the magnificent Jennifer Holliday at the gay bar QuadZ. It used to be called Spurline. Different name but same terrific place.
My friends and I had been there on the Friday night and it was announced that Miss Holliday, in town for a Saturday night concert, would be stopping by on Sunday night to sing a few songs. My friend Mark and I decided to return and we made friends with a couple who had a front table in the absolutely packed establishment.
Sure enough, Effie herself arrived pretty much on time and made clear to those who thought it would be a drag queen performing: “Honey, they gonna know the truth. Hand me a microphone!”
She belted out a handful of songs including I Am Changing andAnd I’m Tellin’ You I’m Not Going.
She gave us her all and we were delirious. I think I may have cried at one point it was all just so unbelievable and delicious.
Miss Holliday thanked all of us from the small stage and said: “The gay community allowed me to sing when I didn’t have any hits … because of this community, we’ve been able to survive and live and keep our dignity. … I’m so glad that you all love me. I always want to be a part of your lives. Thank you for keeping my name in your hearts all these years.”
This was a night none of us who were there would ever forget.
Today, the Tony winner and Grammy winner, who starred in both Dreamgirls and The Color Purple on Broadway, turns 60.
Below is her legendary performance at the 1982 Tony Awards. Happy birthday to the original Effie!
The man best known as the father on The Brady Bunch left us far too young.
Robert Reed, born 88 years ago today, was just 59 when he died of colon cancer back in 1992.
During the five-season run of The Brady Bunch followed by The Brady Bunch Variety Hour, The Brady Brides, the TV movie A Very Brady Christmas and the final series The Bradys, the television viewing audience did not know that the man dispensing fatherly advice to Greg, Marcia, Peter, Jan, Bobby and Cindy was living a very gay life off-screen.
It became public knowledge after his death that Reed was also HIV-positive. While the tabloids ran with the story in a most sensational way, in the years after his death, Brady Bunch leading lady Florence Henderson spoke so warmly and honestly of her TV husband and his dedication to his TV family – on screen and off. I think she helped people forget those tabloid headlines and focus more on the talent and legacy of this fine actor.
In her autobiography Life Is Not a Stage, the late Miss Henderson recalled the actor’s initial discomfort doing love scenes with his TV wife. Here is an excerpt:
We had been doing a love scene that had gone fine in rehearsal but wasn’t working to John’s liking the way was doing it. I felt like I had to step in and do something.
“Excuse me for a moment,” I said to Bob. I had suddenly realized the source of the problem. I left him and walked out of camera range and took [the director] off to the side.
“Just back off,” I told the director. “Don’t say anything or make a big deal out of this, but Bob’s gay. He’s nervous about this scene.”
I told him I knew how to handle it. I
went back on the set and we started up again. I don’t remember what I said specifically to Bob, but I took extra care with him to make sure he felt comfortable. In that moment, I tried to love him as hard as I could and make him feel great. I wanted him to feel romantic and sexy as all get out. And perhaps, if he knew I was comfortable about him and his sexuality, he didn’t have to feel bad about playing that role. I don’t think the crew caught on to this in the beginning as I had, but most did as the show went on.
Every time we’d do a romantic scene, the same nervousness would come up. We’d laugh as he came on to the set in his pajamas. I think on those days he would frequently self-medicate by drinking more than usual at lunchtime.
Although Reed decried the quality of The Brady Bunch scripts, he always returned for the reunions and subsequent series and was said to have enjoyed the ABC variety series the cast did in the mid-70s most of all.
Reed had other memorable roles including starring in TV’s The Defenders, the drama Nurse opposite Micheal Learned, the miniseries Rich Man, Poor Man and a classic two-part episode of Medical Center which had him playing a man who undergoes surgery to become a woman.
There are so many online reunions going on this year that I guess it’s inevitable that some would slip through the cracks. This is one worth calling attention to and checking out. It’s a reunion of the casts of Father of the Bride and Father of the Bride Part 2 in a sequel of sorts Father of the Bride Part 3 (ish).
Twenty-five years after the second movie’s release, the Banks Family gathered together for a Zoom call and a very special wedding-related announcement.
In addition to returnees Steve Martin, Diane Keaton, Martin Short, Kieran Culkin (my favorite of all the cast in this), Kimberly Williams-Paisley, and George Newbern, we get Ben Platt as the now-grown baby from the second movie and Florence Pugh as the now-grown grandbaby. Alexandra Shipp plays the bride and her father is played by Robert DeNiro!
I’m late to the game when it comes to Schitt’s Creek but these days I’m watching at least one or two episodes a day and enjoying every single one of them – immensely. I’m even watching interviews about Schitt’s Creek including this recent one with co-creator and star Dan Levy.
On this episode of “You Sang My Song,” country music legend Dolly Parton watches fan covers of her songs on YouTube. She listens to covers of her songs “9 to 5,” “I Will Always Love You,” “Jolene,” and “Hard Candy Christmas.” Dolly shares her affection for the fan covers and offers sweet words of wisdom and encouragement to the fans that created them. Dolly Parton’s A Holly Dolly Christmas featuring collaborations with Miley Cyrus, Michael Buble, Jimmy Fallon and more is available now: http://dolly.lnk.to/AHollyDollyChristmas
British actor Max Irons celebrated his 35th birthday on Saturday.
The the son of Jeremy Irons has brooding good looks and is also known for his roles in The Riot Club, Tutankhamun, Red Riding Hood, The White Queen and The Host.
While first starting off in acting, Irons worked as a bartender and had a modeling contract.
Maybe This Time is best known as a song sung by Liza Minnelli’s character of Sally Bowles in the 1972 film Cabaret. But it is is a song that was written by John Kander and Fred Ebb for the late, great Kaye Ballard.
In the first video, Miss Ballard tells the origins of the song then sings it herself. It this point, it she was in her late 80s but she still had the chops and the charm.
Minnelli had included the song on her debut studio album Liza! Liza! in 1964 then on her 1970 album New Feelin’. But after Cabaret, it turned into a traditional pop standard and has been covered many times – including on Schitt’s Creek!
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Via Instagram: Happy to finally share my essay with friends overseas & you.
As a young boy in Adelaide, I was sensitive, dressing up to entertain people from as early as I can remember. Now that’s my job. I began at an all-boys school, where I was bullied from start to finish.
It was well-known that if an actor was open about their private life and was not conforming, they didn’t land leading roles. The sentiment shattered me because I finally thought I knew who I was, I actually became an activist at that point. I was really out, loud, and proud. Ultimately, my heart was again broken, and I again fell in love with a woman. I was too embarrassed to tell anyone, as I’d made such a fuss about my same-sex relationship. “You can’t be both,” some would say. “You’re confused.” No shit! At that point I began to be more selective with whom I shared my world.
I was in no way mentally prepared for what would happen when Ben Rafter made his entrance on Aussie TV. At 22, I was back in a relationship with a guy. Having been fairly open prior, some public cottoned on, wanted to know “my deal”. But tormented by the recurring idea of being labeled when I wasn’t even sure myself, I decided it was best to be private. My world became smaller but my love became bigger, and our relationship more sacred and special for it.
When the marriage equality vote loomed in 2017, I thought I should come honest about the relationships I’d had in the past. I approached a friend who worked with the LGBTQIA+ community only to be asked not to come out at that moment. “You will have more of an impact and effect with those on the fence as a neutral voice. You are someone people respect and relate to regardless of anything – everyone else is already flying the flag”
By sharing my story now, becoming more transparent maybe others who are private might be given a break? We might live and let them live as they wish. I believe labels are for clothes not for people. Even if a few people read this and relate then sharing this was worth the world to me.
Hallmark Gifts Us With New Clip From Channel’s First LGBTQ Holiday Movie 
Matt Dallas has grown up before out eyes and today he turns 38!
Tyler Posey Gets Real About Coming Out on Instagram 
Wishing the best today to beloved actor Jeff Bridges who revealed on Monday afternoon that he has been diagnosed with lymphoma.
On his fifth nomination, for Crazy Heart in 2009, he finally won an Oscar. The next year, he was nominated again for True Grit and most recently in 2017 for Hell or High Water.
Back in 2018, I was in Palm Springs for a week hanging out with some of my best guy friends for my birthday week.
The man best known as the father on The Brady Bunch left us far too young.
We had been doing a love scene that had gone fine in rehearsal but wasn’t working to John’s liking the way was doing it. I felt like I had to step in and do something.
I didn’t even know this existed!
Aussie actor Hugh Sheridan says he’s been with men and women but prefers not to be labelled 
See Jennifer Hudson as Aretha Franklin in new Respect photos 
British actor Max Irons celebrated his 35th birthday on Saturday.
